The Seal of the Blog
I've often thought about the content and rules of this blog. What are the proper limits of what I write? What should I put in, and what should I leave out? Of the many different types of blog that exist, some, I know, are completely anonymous; and anonymity is an essential part of what they are about, which is the complete freedom of the writer to express anything and everything they want to. This is OK, perhaps; but wouldn't suit me because I would never quite believe in the possibility of no one ever discovering my identity. In the case of Christian ministry bloggers, anonymity isn't really an option. We are inevitably public figures, and that is reflected in what we blog. Whether it's maggi dawn, Kathryn, Daniel, or many others, our identity is transparent.
This means that, as a general rule, I try not to write anything that I would not wish to be read by
1 my mother
2 my boss (the Bishop)
3 my wife
4 the weakest brother or sister in the congregation, who could be scandalised by something I write.
But what about the anonymity of people I write about? The confidentiality of anything that might be said to me? It would be pastorally disastrous if parishioners started saying to themselves: I don't want to talk to the Vicar about this, it'll be all over his blog before the end of the day. Or maybe worse yet, the person who tells you scandalous things in the hope that you will put them in your blog!
Here the rule I've applied is, never to use full names, but only a general description of a person, or just a first name, or a code name. Not to record anything at all that was said in confidence. My general descriptions and slightly veiled identities may be adequate if jfreeman or Mumcat or Dave read this, but any parishioner reading it will probably know instantly, or soon be able to identify, who I'm talking about. So I will not write anything about anyone that that person would not wish to be common knowledge, or that I would not say about them to their face. In general this means I will only say good (and true!) things about them, which may be helpful, encouraging or edifying to someone.
One effect of these rules seems to be, that the experience of blogging is much healthier than that of private spiritual journalling. I kept that kind of journal some years back: a 'for my eyes only' record of my spiritual journey through a period in my life when I was dealing with a bout of depression, and the painful process of moving across theological and belief frontiers. The discipline was supposed to be healing, but its actual effect was the reverse: it trapped me in a vicious cycle of introspection, self-pity and guilt. In contrast to this, the discipline of blogging encourages extraversion, looking away from yourself and your problems, to see the good, the positive, the amusing or interesting, in other people and in the world around.
But there are some things it can't provide. This morning I spent an hour and a half with my 'soul friend' - preferred title for what used to be called a spiritual director. I had gone, unsure about what to talk about, and ended up telling the whole story of the four months since my last visit. A time that has been full, rich, many-faceted, apparently chaotic and directionless; yet telling the story brings into focus how much it is all about God, and what is going on between us. Where God is working in this life, this place, these relationships, these people, this congregation, this particular time. And it was an emotional experience. Where blogging helps hold it together, telling it to Anamchara releases tears of healing. Weeping for the dear ones who have suffered or died, for all those I have loved, for my parents in their frailty and age, for all the people I would help and cannot, for all who are making beauty, goodness and truth out of life's raw materials.
Thank you, Anamchara, dear sister, for listening and helping to make sense of this life. Thank you, all the dear ones who help make this life what it is. Sheer gift.
This means that, as a general rule, I try not to write anything that I would not wish to be read by
1 my mother
2 my boss (the Bishop)
3 my wife
4 the weakest brother or sister in the congregation, who could be scandalised by something I write.
But what about the anonymity of people I write about? The confidentiality of anything that might be said to me? It would be pastorally disastrous if parishioners started saying to themselves: I don't want to talk to the Vicar about this, it'll be all over his blog before the end of the day. Or maybe worse yet, the person who tells you scandalous things in the hope that you will put them in your blog!
Here the rule I've applied is, never to use full names, but only a general description of a person, or just a first name, or a code name. Not to record anything at all that was said in confidence. My general descriptions and slightly veiled identities may be adequate if jfreeman or Mumcat or Dave read this, but any parishioner reading it will probably know instantly, or soon be able to identify, who I'm talking about. So I will not write anything about anyone that that person would not wish to be common knowledge, or that I would not say about them to their face. In general this means I will only say good (and true!) things about them, which may be helpful, encouraging or edifying to someone.
One effect of these rules seems to be, that the experience of blogging is much healthier than that of private spiritual journalling. I kept that kind of journal some years back: a 'for my eyes only' record of my spiritual journey through a period in my life when I was dealing with a bout of depression, and the painful process of moving across theological and belief frontiers. The discipline was supposed to be healing, but its actual effect was the reverse: it trapped me in a vicious cycle of introspection, self-pity and guilt. In contrast to this, the discipline of blogging encourages extraversion, looking away from yourself and your problems, to see the good, the positive, the amusing or interesting, in other people and in the world around.
But there are some things it can't provide. This morning I spent an hour and a half with my 'soul friend' - preferred title for what used to be called a spiritual director. I had gone, unsure about what to talk about, and ended up telling the whole story of the four months since my last visit. A time that has been full, rich, many-faceted, apparently chaotic and directionless; yet telling the story brings into focus how much it is all about God, and what is going on between us. Where God is working in this life, this place, these relationships, these people, this congregation, this particular time. And it was an emotional experience. Where blogging helps hold it together, telling it to Anamchara releases tears of healing. Weeping for the dear ones who have suffered or died, for all those I have loved, for my parents in their frailty and age, for all the people I would help and cannot, for all who are making beauty, goodness and truth out of life's raw materials.
Thank you, Anamchara, dear sister, for listening and helping to make sense of this life. Thank you, all the dear ones who help make this life what it is. Sheer gift.
posted by Tony at 9/13/2004 09:30:00 pm
5 Comments:
Thanks for these thoughts. I will pass them on to our 'Wibloggers'.
Dave
www.wibsite.com
Oh dear, yes, this is so wise...and I fear I've possibly transgressed already..
Not so much the people as the issues...but then, perhaps it is no bad thing if any of my congregation who might stumble across my blog (a tiny minority, if any,- I suspect that the blogosphere in unknown territory for the most part) do know some of the thinking behind the bits of curate that emerge during sermons etc??I just don't know. Valuable distinction between blogging and journalling too....thanks for highlighting it all.
When I first started writing, I was the only one who knew about my blog. Then when I left a comment with my address on it for the first time, I sweated because I couldn't remember what I'd said during the first couple of months that I'd blogged. I became extra careful at that time. Since then I've realized that there is no one at all that I know who reads my blog. My partner doesn't even have the address. If I want her to see something, then I print it out and take it to her. I don't have it searchable through the search engines or through my profile because I feel as a gay person that I wouldn't feel safe with just anyone from the Internet commenting.
At the same time I struggle with not having it searchable because there are some things that I would want rural GLBT people to see because most don't have access to a church that accepts them as they are. I would hope to make them feel less alone being Christian GLBT persons.
Right now, no one in my home state reads it, so I sometimes am not as careful as I should be. Thank you for bringing this up for me to think about again. I want to tell of my experiences in church, but I wouldn't want to hurt anyone.
Thanks for the comments and interest. I hope I didn't sound prescriptive or judgmental, as if I seemed to be saying, 'Some of the blogs I read clearly offend against all this'! It was much more a question of thinking aloud about what rules *I* thought *I* might follow. I've broken most of them myself! But I tell myself this is the ideal and I will try harder. And I agree, it's probably more necesssary for clergy to be self-regulatory in some way. Though I don't know if this really stands up - are clergy still expected to be 'more Christian' than other Christians. A bit unreasonable, (not to say unrealistic), if so!
great thoughts. i personally do blog anonymously, but that is so that i'm 'google free', not because i wouldn't say these things to people i know. my husband is in ministry, and i've seen far too many search engines ruin the ministries of far too many pastors.
most who write me know my real name and i have developed many friends through blogging. i do know however that there is MUCH that i still don't blog about. my sister, my church, my pastor, etc. - all topics i'd love to blow off steam about, but i know that if i did eventually get out-ed those things would be hurtful or damaging.
my rule for blogging is that it is 'my stuff' or my opinions about 'the church' as a whole or politics, women's issues, etc. to bash or crash is something i have veered away from because of my own 'rules'. i save those kind of things for my journal, or my vent time with friends or therapist.
definately worth thinking about, much damage can be done in breaking these rules.
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