Saint's Funeral
Today we said farewell to one of our elderly saints. She had only been with us for about four years. That was when she and her husband moved from North London to this parish, into the 'granny flat' attached to her son and daughter-in-law's house. I conducted her husband's funeral nearly three years ago. Since then, she continued to worship with us and win the hearts of many in the congregation.
Three months ago she was diagnosed as being terminally ill. Characteristically, she chose not to accept any of the invasive treatments that might have prolonged her life for a month or two, but with relatively little improvement in quality of life. She was very matter of fact in how she spoke about her illness, the pain she was suffering, and her approaching death. She wouldn't have any truck with all those ways of talking that collude with those who are dying-in-denial. You know the kind of thing: the prayers for healing; the promises of 'what we'll do when you're well'. When you prayed with her, it was clearly for strength to go through that Journey that lies in front of all of us. When friends and relatives visited her in the last few weeks, it was clear that they were coming to say Good-bye, and Thank You.
Today the church was full of the people who loved her and felt blessed by her faith and generosity of spirit.
How sad it is, that this example of faith facing death, seems relatively unusual to us. In most churches, we seem to absorb from the doctors and hospitals the whole culture of the avoidance and denial of dying. The groups that have had to deal with the whole HIV/AIDS thing, are light years ahead of the rest of the Church in all this. Yet only a couple of hundred years ago, Bishop Jeremy Taylor's Holy Dying was one of the hot Christian best-sellers. I don't know what my local Christian bookshop would say if I went in there tomorrow and said, 'Have you got a Christian self-help book on dying?' But I'm darn sure that it's something we need to learn.
Because this dear, saintly lady's example was such a powerful witness to all of us there in church today, and in stark contrast to last week's funeral, attended by me and about eight others. I know which I'd prefer my funeral to be like.
Three months ago she was diagnosed as being terminally ill. Characteristically, she chose not to accept any of the invasive treatments that might have prolonged her life for a month or two, but with relatively little improvement in quality of life. She was very matter of fact in how she spoke about her illness, the pain she was suffering, and her approaching death. She wouldn't have any truck with all those ways of talking that collude with those who are dying-in-denial. You know the kind of thing: the prayers for healing; the promises of 'what we'll do when you're well'. When you prayed with her, it was clearly for strength to go through that Journey that lies in front of all of us. When friends and relatives visited her in the last few weeks, it was clear that they were coming to say Good-bye, and Thank You.
Today the church was full of the people who loved her and felt blessed by her faith and generosity of spirit.
How sad it is, that this example of faith facing death, seems relatively unusual to us. In most churches, we seem to absorb from the doctors and hospitals the whole culture of the avoidance and denial of dying. The groups that have had to deal with the whole HIV/AIDS thing, are light years ahead of the rest of the Church in all this. Yet only a couple of hundred years ago, Bishop Jeremy Taylor's Holy Dying was one of the hot Christian best-sellers. I don't know what my local Christian bookshop would say if I went in there tomorrow and said, 'Have you got a Christian self-help book on dying?' But I'm darn sure that it's something we need to learn.
Because this dear, saintly lady's example was such a powerful witness to all of us there in church today, and in stark contrast to last week's funeral, attended by me and about eight others. I know which I'd prefer my funeral to be like.
posted by Tony at 9/01/2004 07:01:00 pm
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